Time to Fire Your Inner Critic

                    –Negativity is Often Our Loudest Voice

 

Time to Fire Your Inner Critic. Like fo’ re-all. Self-Criticism is a DOWNER and tru-ly the antithesis of self-care and WellBeing. Just like Worry is the Anti-Wellness Drug, we may think these things keep us safe but they really don’t. We all have them but the question is how to silence your inner critic? Gaining freedom from your inner critic is a game-changer! One key is watching your negativity meter.

Keep reading, and I will give you some concrete suggestions on how to conquer your Inner Critic.

Though seemingly helpful at times, our Inner Critics are basically tormentors. Inner Critics only speak in accusatory tones and never ever ever compliment us. Matter of fact, if we allow those critics to hold sway, one would never think we were good at anything. We are also plagued by Inner Critics if we have that perfectionism thang happenin’ boy that can be torture!

Swirl that around in your mind a moment. Often, negativity reigns in our minds.

Whenever I have gone through a deep depression, my Inner Critics were at the forefront of the downward spiral…’you’re a failure ’cause you don’t have XYZ by now, everyone else does’ or ‘you should be doing this by now’ or ‘you should have achieved this by now‘ or ‘you shouldn’t be going through this now‘ or ‘you shouldn’t be feeling this right now‘ or any other self-esteem breaking sentiment.

Mannnnnn it’s EXHAUSTING!

 

Do You Know Your Inner Critics By Name?

 

The lead Inner Critic in my head was my step-mother, geez, there was nothing good that I did in her eyes. She criticized me for eh-vuh-ry f**kin’ thang. If I got a 98 on a test I didn’t do well enough because I didn’t get 100. While in high school when I slayed ’em during a dance performance, on the way home she pointed out every flaw… (let’s not even give a girl credit for starting to dance at 15 when most trained female dancers start anywhere from the age of 2-7 years old!)

…and the ride home was at least an hour. It was filled with all her bitchin’ about my mistakes, there were nevah any compliments. EVAH.

So having her voice constantly jabberin’ at me since the age of 10 had serious staying power. Her criticism didn’t end when I was a grown-ass adult either. But over time I had become more aware of Gloria screaming in my head and was able to silence her.

Her constant messaging? ‘You’re not good enough, you didn’t do that well enough and you are subpar.’

DAMN.

And then there was my aunt. Her voices consisted of Ms. Etiquette, Ms. Oh I Don’t Like That, and  Ms. That’s Wrong I Don’t Approve of What You’re Doing’

And last but not least, Ms. Her Way or No Way (a running family theme). There was and is a PLETHORA of do’s and don’ts OMG. Needless to say, I didn’t like having to go visit her when I was little. Whenever we did go, I had to be beyond my bestest behavior. Once she told me she’d forgotten I was even there because I was so quiet…I had gone into the study to play with my “imaginary” friends. Luckily they didn’t make me laugh out loud which they loved to do–even they were on their best behavior!

DAMN.

And ohhhhhhh let’s not forget Daddy Dearest. Him and Gloria played tag team in my head trying to out shout the other. Oh brother.

 

OMFG, How Do I Shut Those Voices Up?

 

That’s not to say that the voices occupying space in my head have been evicted, but I have learned how to fire them from running and ruining my Life. Sometimes those peeps can serve as protection or warnings to keep me in a safer space. Sometimes those voices can urge me to go further when I haven’t quite given my all, even though I thought I had.

But. I no longer allow those MOFO’s carte blanche to make me feel less than or to live rent free in my head. Nor are they able to make me feel bad about decisions I’ve made or are about to make.

 

To Fire Your Inner Critic(s) You Must Take Inventory

 

1. First of all, become more Aware of the fact that you even have Inner Critics. That they are not your voices but of various folks in your Life that have imprinted some sort of  deep negative impact. That may sound like DUH but you have to learn to separate what is the critical voice versus what your Intuition is telling you. 

2. If you are feeling bad based on what your IC (Inner Critic) has said ask yourself ‘why am I continuing to let those voices bully me?’ ‘Am I really what they are saying and the way they are saying it?’ Notice they never sound loving or encouraging ever. Try to get to the Inner Knowing. There is always a Greater You (Your Higher Self, Your GOD Essence) who knows better. That part of you knows that those voices are not-who-you-really-are.

3. Raise your Awareness in your negativity meter–you can always tell what’s going on in your mind predominately by how you feel.

4. Which brings me to–becoming more Aware of this equation: What I Think Precedes What I Feel. Now I realize that’s a tough one for many (and it sounded like a load of bull to me in the beginning until I began to connect the dots…)

5. Once you begin to see the correlations, when those ICs start jammerin’ atcha PIVOT PIVOT PIVOT. Switch to a different thought, one that’s uplifting. Or insert an Affirmation. If your IC says “you never do anything right!” insert the total opposite or anything that makes you feel good.

6. Be Patient and Intend to improve your relationship of yourself to Self. More Love, More Love, MORE LOVE. It takes time (but please don’t keep score). Remember that your ICs have had residence within your mind for a very, very, very long time. We are so swamped in negativity that sometimes our minds convince us that’s all there is.

 

Remember To…

 

**Allow the Light of Self-Love to stream through more often.

**Inner Critics do not have Your Highest Good in mind. Self-Love does.

**The more you Recognize Your Inner Light and Your Beautiful Qualities you will realize that not only are you more than enough but that you are a Unique and Worthy Being.

**And as that really begins to dawn on you, the more you will begin to see that You Are a part of The Whole, a part of The ONE, ever growing, ever Becoming.

**As You turn Your Attention away from Your Inner Critic(s), that/those critical voice(s) will no longer be able to run you into the ground into depression and constant self-doubt.

**You will be in Receivership of being able to HEAR and FEEL the Inner Voices Guiding You with more Love, more Light, and more Wisdom, without the blockages of the Inner Critics.

 

My Serenity Sunday Guided Meditation with Sound Healing Can Help

 

Serenity Sunday is my monthly virtual guided meditation offering. It is monthly and a great way to ground, center, refuel and refresh. It is with sound healing and is sooooooooo soothing! Only 30 minutes of your time. One is coming up, be sure to book your spot through my Wellness Events page.

“Jacquie is so amazing at what she does. Woke up the day after my guided meditation with her, feeling so happy, refreshed and clear minded, despite not feeling that way at all before our session. It was such a beautiful release my body and mind needed. Thank you Jacquie” –Sarah Burns

“Serenity Sunday is powerful reassurance that you’re on the right path. Jacquie is as intuitive as she is talented! Gratitude is infinite.” –Zan Bey