CRITICISM

CRITICISM. We are sooooo quick to CRITICIZE. We criticize ourselves, that Inner Critic thing that I talk about (see my other post, Self Torture, Punishment & Our Critical Selves), we criticize people, things, places, etc. You name it, we criticize it. Matter-of-fact, I riff on this topic a lot because it is sooooo insidious, we do it so often and so freely that much of the time we are totally unaware while are doing it!

But one thing to know, criticism doesn’t feel good, maybe we delude ourselves into thinking it does, but it doesn’t. The next time someone is being critical, take a look at their face–usually there’s a look of unpleasantness and boy do that often enough, it takes shape in the face itself. I remember some adult always telling me not to frown because it would leave wrinkles. Luckily, I listened…sort of.

Ask yourself: how much time in your day do you spend, CRITICIZING or critiquing or complaining? It’s one thing to critique if that fits your job description but HOW you criticize is something to be Aware of. Do you throw flame arrows at the folks under you or do you critique with Compassion and Awareness? 

I can hear some of you in Management positions saying some workers need to be yelled at to get anything done, that they need a dressing down to be effective. I’m sure that’s just as stressful to and for you as it is for the person/people you manage and can’t possibly be an enjoyable thing. Figure out if there’s another way, for your sanity and theirs.

In addition to being a Wellness Guide, I choreograph for children ages 8-18 and work with upwards of 400 children when it’s showtime. Trust me, I do A LOT of yelling. BUT. I have had to learn how to deal differently if I wanted to not be tied up in knots like I used to be. Next step is yelling much much less, I’m getting there as I am making more Conscious Choices.

Back to the Previous Question…

And that is, how much time in your day do you spend CRITICIZING, critiquing or complaining about something?  Mmm…think about that. 25%, 50%, 75% or would you say you spend 100% of your day? Be honest with yourself. The saying is that Life is Short, so think again, how much of your time do you want to spend with your face screwed up? And trust that with every harsh word or Thought, the effects of that negative energy settle into your body and lower your Vibration, your Frequency.

So as you go through your day, pay more Attention to what’s coming out of your mouth and rolling through your head, “am I complaining, or am I complementary? Am I complaining, or am I Appreciating?” Because the more you find things to Appreciate, the more things Flow into your Life to Appreciate.

Let the people that you Love know that you Appreciate them. And you know, if you have a Partner, and there’s things they do that you don’t like, but you see that they’re trying, let them know that you notice it. “heyyyyyy, I noticed you did XYZ today, I noticed that you tried. THANK YOU.” That acknowledgement goes a long way.

APPRECIATE More, Complain LESS

Catch yourself. Pay Attention to what comes out of your mouth and what goes into and through your head. Become more Aware of You in Your Space. Be kinder to yourself, lessen up on the self-criticism because that’s some lethal energy to hurl at yourself on a daily basis! Self care is more than getting your nails and feet done, more than eating healthy and exercising though that’s all part of it. But the part we tend to skip is how we treat ourselves mentally.

I got criticized A LOT when I was a kid after my mom died. Mannnnn, it was unrelenting! My stepmom was a constant barrage of criticism always hurled in my direction, hardly ever (or so it seemed) at my younger brother. I was expected to be PERFECT according to her standards (I have a post on Perfectionism for ya to check out too).

In later years, hers was the voice I carried, the one who was never satisfied, always pushing. It wasn’t until I began to do some Deep Inner Work that I was able to identify and quiet that mouth, Embracing myself fully was key. Then I began to realize that most of her criticism was due to her background and circumstances that were pretty rough and trying.

Looking Inside, helps to break the cycle that is so often generational as you begin to change habits that don’t apply to the Person You Are Becoming. Which is always ongoing. Growth is ongoing.

Treat yourself better using Compassion and Awareness, and you’ll treat others better too. Heck, you may notice that people treat you better as well.

That will help make your part of The Universe shine brighter, and shed Light onto others.

Holla back, I welcome your mindful comments and thoughts.

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WELL-BEING RESOURCES

from Jacquie Bird, Spiritual Wellness:

Check out my Wellness Guide 28 Daily Thoughts & Mantras 4 Mindfulness–Keys 4 Stress Relief & Personal Growth,

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